My Insides Out

What I like about this is that I can sit at a keyboard and let my insides come out in any way I want.  I was raised right, so they’re not going to profane anyone or anything… but they don’t have to be structured in any way other than “just as I am”, know what I mean?

No particular theme or organizational quality – not that those are bad things, ’cause they’re certainly not – just Sharon or Shamma on a palette of cyberpaper with swirls and curls and sways of my own design under God’s power and grace.  Cathartically speaking, it’s the only way to write!

Though there’s not always a “topic” per se, writing is something I feel I must do to stay healthily alive.  If I’m not doing it on paper or on my computer, I’m doing it in my heart and mind… I’m drawing lines and shading and shadowing images with descriptors.  Metaphors and similes are my brushes depicting light and color against the steady canvas of my experiences.

Storytelling is my life’s expression in so many ways because I love looking into the workings of occasions and happenings and emotions and reasonings and things often unuttered.  I can’t imagine not saying things, at least somewhere!  If words don’t come out of my mouth, they come out on paper.  If they don’t come out on paper, they come out on my computer; that’s the only way I can live with me ’cause I’m not God.  God can live with anyone under any circumstances.  That’s why He’s God and I’m not.

Sometimes words and emotions and thoughts are like a ball of string coming out of my head… unraveling slowly and hooking on various corners and edges surrounding my mind’s window.  They make wonderful tapestry most days… some days they make webs… other days they make those funky designs you see on Spirograph™ wheels (remember Hasbro’s Spirograph™?).  Then, at very special times, my thoughts talk to me; yeah, they have things to say and I listen to them because I know that eventually Holy Spirit will take over so that my life can make sense.

Dear God, I love writing… !

I love thinking, I love feeling, I love emoting… I love it all and I’m glad I was made this way.  God absolutely knew what He was doing when He made me, friends.  I love being me – even though I’ve hated me at times – because I don’t misunderstand anymore the God Who made me.  That gets me through it all because then I can ask Him to help me better understand me.  That makes it all worthwhile and masterfully interesting.

Unstructured and amazed… my “insides” are coming out – again.




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