Coming Alive Again

I’ve resumed painting – this time with acrylics – and I really like it.

My husband has taken a greater interest in cooking lately – and he seems to like it also. That’s a good thing for both of us.  Serving God is our main focus, and He allows us to indulge in hobbies to His glory that also bring us JOY.

I’m experimenting with clouds… painting them, I mean.

Jack is experimenting with broiling… his first attempt was delicious! Just browning the mashed potatoes set atop two blocks of meatloaf… kind of Shepherd’s Pie style… and we truly enjoyed it.

The Lord helped me with every single thing I did painting with those brushes; feeling them in my hands (I’m ambidextrous) and getting the shading and highlighting right.  God is SO generous. Here’s how they turned out:

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“Light Among the Treetops” Copyright 2016 SJ Palmer

The treetops aren’t always noticed by many – including me. When big, fluffy clouds pass over them headed toward the light from now on I will try to look up at the “Light Among the Treetops” © 2016.

I’d never painted a cloud prior to this and, truthfully, the top set are my very favorite; the bottom need adjusting albeit, with clouds, any shape has realism.

The way acrylics dry so quickly takes some getting used to, but I’ve found I truly enjoy the way their setting so quickly keeps me on point as I paint. I started as an oils girl.

A New Land

So now my husband is drawing closer and closer to the kitchen, and I think he really likes it. He’s the kind of person who needs to keep busy or else he feels unproductive, unworthy, and without value. While I’ve committed that gross misconception to God’s power, I am happy to see him gravitate toward an enjoyable pastime. Nothing wrong with having hobbies, only something wrong when the hobbies “have” you. God willing, I will live and continue praying for his sense of self-worth.  Concurrently, I’ll enjoy the little masterpieces that make him feel useful. Here’s how those mini Shepherd’s Pies turned out:

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Jack’s mini Shepherd’s Pies

YUM! 🙂 God will use whatever means available to breathe life back into a waning situation.  Acrylics painting for me and cooking for Jack is a healthy step in the right direction. When life is present and flourishing, death can be driven away quickly, evenly, and with trust. God is our constant Help; He is our Breath of Life, our Friend, and our Trust everlasting.  Amen.

SHAMMA

The Struggle: Writing a Book

As much as I absolutely love writing, you’d think I’d sail through writing this book.  I’ve written two  Vision books already, but this is my testimony in book form… I think that’s the problem.

Even though Jesus has delivered me from the trauma associated with my early years, the empathic emotions associated with it remain. That’s how God works, allowing those of us who’ve moved on to retain the compassion necessary to minister to those walking where we’ve been.

Seeing demons and being adversely impacted by it – I’ve been there. Learning by degrees my authority in Christ and my identity in Him – been there, too.

Being molested as a child – been there.  Learning to forgive that molester – recently been there, too.

Indulging in homosexual practices for years as a result of that molestation’s influence on my own choices – been there.  Repenting for my part in choosing to embrace that lifestyle – been there, too.

Coming back to a faithful walk in Christ and losing my mother at age 27 – been there.

Enjoying victory and authority and discernment in Jesus Christ because of a million mega-deliverances, including a Freedom Encounter – I’m still there.

So what’s the problem writing this book?  I suppose the same difficulty it would present anyone upon revisiting a treacherously dark place.  You know, Jesus doesn’t have any attachments to the enemy and vice-versa, but it greatly saddens and disturbs Him to walk through the caverns of Hell.  It’s just a place where nothing Godly belongs.

As long as I allow God’s truth and identity to move through me, I can bear the emotional effects and give testimony in joy, but that’s not always easy for me… so I avoid the writing.  I stay in the happy neighborhood God’s moved me to without booking flights down to the “hell” that used to be.

Sounds like I need (yet) another deliverance, doesn’t it? Well, if so, ain’t no big, because I know it works. Been there.

So, Shamma, p l e a s e … write the book!

 

Observing Matrimony: A Testimony

What I find fascinating about being newly married (nearly 7 months) is how much I’m learning about my own sexual appetites and temperatures. While I enjoy intimacy with my husband like any wife would, I am not overtly sexual. Most men are, and I admit that sometimes I feel bad about not being as “hungry” as my husband.

I notice I have sexual cravings and urges in what I call “clusters”. It’s not surprising that the height of our activity surrounds my ovulation cycles… after all, it ain’t over ’til it’s over. 🙂  Sitting back and watching me be me after not having an opportunity to be sexual according to God’s definitions (within the bonds of matrimony) has been quite educational.

I’ve also learned that men never grow too old for interest in sex.  Their appetites really do persist well into later years.  My husband is 28 years my senior, and I am 50… you do the math; the man is absolutely still going strong, and he is attractive and sexy. “Interested” in sex is an understatement. He is very healthy!

I cover this testimony with the Blood of Jesus and I forbid the enemy access to it.  God has truly blessed us both, and the best part for me is getting to know myself sexually after all these years.

Thank You, Jesus!

(Btw, if you are still waiting on God’s promises for matrimony, don’t give up hope. What He’s graciously and faithfully done for one He’ll do for all, with just as much grace and faithfulness.)